"Through the Light"
The Near-Death Experience of Mellen-Thomas Benedict
Mellen-Thomas Benedict's case is part of my original near-death
research; a brief version of it appears in my book, BEYOND THE LIGHT. I can
attest that his case is genuine and his claims about the brain tumor and the
conditions of his death are true. I have met his mother and step-father, been
in his and their homes, and have followed his life since - his struggles and
his accomplishments - as he sought to find a way to integrate his experience
into his daily life while still honoring the mission he felt guided to fulfill.
What you are about to read has a hint of mystery to it, and this is the
mystery: this version of his story (which reads like an article) is actually a
transcription of a tape made of a talk he gave about a decade ago. Whoever did
the transcription then put the story on the Internet for free distribution.
Five different people sent it to me, so I contacted Mellen-Thomas to discuss
the situation. He and I both felt it was as if the Universe, his soul, God, was
saying to him. . . "It's time now to open up and share your story. You
have something to say that needs to be heard." Whoever put his material on
the Internet did the man a favor, actually, did all of us a favor, and not just
because his is such an interesting case (it truly is) - but because of how he
has matured since and what he has learned. Should you wish to contact him, he
has given me permission to publish his address and telephone number:
Mellen-Thomas Benedict, P. O. Box 1898, Soquel, CA 95073; (831) 427-5554. (The
address and phone on the Internet version are incorrect.)
--Dr. P. M. H. Atwater
This account is extremely special in so many ways. This is a core
account where he was dead for 1-1/2 hours after dying of cancer. He came back,
with the most amazing story - and a healed body. The spiritual wisdom contained
in this account is awesome. Mellen-Thomas is an amazing fellow to talk to! He
was told a long time ago, his account belonged to the world, so he never sold
the rights to a book publisher or film producer. He freely shares his account.
I originally found out about this account from a Finnish doctor who asked
Aussie friend for a copy of the account. And . . . Lastly, is the extreme
gratitude to Kevin Williams http://www.near-death.com for all his hard work on
NDE research and for sharing this account with NDERF. The lack of
proprietorship is one of the true hallmarks of credibility for NDE research -
they are there for everyone!
Experience Description:
Mellen-Thomas Benedict is an artist who survived a near-death experience
in 1982. He died extremely discouraged about the nuclear and ecology crisis on
our planet. He was dead for over an hour and a half and during that time, he
rose up out of his body and went into the Light. Curious about the universe, he
was taken far into the remote depths of existence, and even beyond, into the
energetic Void of Nothingness behind the Big Bang. During his experience, he
was able to learn a great deal of information concerning reincarnation. Because
of his near-death experience, he was able to bring back scientific discoveries.
Mellen has been closely involved in the mechanics of cellular communication and
research dealing with the relationship of light to life called Quantum Biology.
This research is providing dramatic new perspectives on how biological systems
work. Mellen has found that living cells can respond very quickly to light
stimulation resulting in, among other things, high speed healing. He is a
researcher, inventor and lecturer who holds six U.S. patents.
He brought back deep and fascinating insights into scientific and
spiritual questions. Now full of faith and healed of his illness, he lives in
California, helping heal others and working with university scientists to
explore theoretical frontiers.
Dr. Janice Holden, in the Department of Counselor Education at the
University of North Texas confirms that Mellen-Thomas, under hypnosis, was able
to give accurate information about and draw the genetic makeup of a rare
neuromuscular disease. She was astounded by this, saying "It’s not the
kind of thing where one could cheat" (Blaser).
Dr. Beverly Rubik, a bio-physicist and founding Chair of the Center for
Frontier Science at Temple University, has also tested Mellen-Thomas’ insight.
She let him try his technique for healing with light on her. She had some
raspberry bramble scratches on her arm and let him shine his light treatment on
half the scratches for ten minutes. The treated scratches healed twice as fast
as the untreated. "I am very much impressed with the ideas that he gets
for the future of medical technology," she says, especially since he’s not
a trained bio-physicist or engineer" (Blaser).
Mellen-Thomas Benedict lives in California, speaking, leading workshops,
and researching new healing techniques from the Light.
A portion of his near-death experience appears in P.M.H. Atwater's book,
Beyond the Light. Concerning Mellen's near-death experience, Dr. Kenneth Ring,
a professor at the University of Connecticut, remarked, "His story is one
of the most remarkable I have encountered in my extensive research on
near-death experiences."
Mellen-Thomas Benedict's Story:
In 1982 I died from terminal cancer. The condition I had was inoperable,
and any kind of chemotherapy they could give me would just have made me more of
a vegetable. I was given six to eight months to live. I had been an information
freak in the 1970's, and I had become increasingly despondent over the nuclear
crisis, the ecology crisis, and so forth.
So, since I did not have a spiritual basis, I began to believe that
nature had made a mistake, and that we were probably a cancerous organism on
the planet. I saw no way that we could get out from all the problems we had created
for ourselves and the planet. I perceived all humans as cancer, and that is
what I got. That is what killed me. Be careful what your world view is. It can
feed back on you, especially if it is a negative world view. I had a seriously
negative one. That is what led me into my death. I tried all sorts of
alternative healing methods, but nothing helped. So I determined that this was
really just between me and God. I had never really faced God before, or even
dealt with God. I was not into any kind of spirituality at the time, but I
began a journey into learning about spirituality and alternative healing. I set
out to do all the reading I could and bone up on the subject, because I did not
want to be surprised on the other side. So I started reading on various
religions and philosophies. They were all very interesting, and gave hope that
there was something on the other side.
On the other hand, as a self-employed stained-glass artist at the time,
I had no medical insurance whatsoever. So my life savings went overnight in
testing. Then I was facing the medical profession without any kind of
insurance. I did not want to have my family dragged down financially, so I
determined to handle this myself. There was not constant pain, but there were
black-outs. I got so that I would not dare to drive, and eventually I ended up
in hospice care. I had my own personal hospice caretaker. I was very blessed by
this angel who went through the last part of this with me. I lasted about
eighteen months. I did not want to take a lot of drugs, since I wanted to be as
conscious as possible. Then I experienced such pain that I had nothing but pain
in my consciousness, luckily only for a few days at a time.
I remember waking up one morning at home about 4:30 am, and I just knew
that this was it. This was the day I was going to die. So I called a few
friends and said goodbye. I woke up my hospice caretaker and told her. I had a
private agreement with her that she would leave my dead body alone for six
hours, since I had read that all kinds of interesting things happen when you
die. I went back to sleep.
The next thing I remember is the beginning of a typical near-death
experience. Suddenly I was fully aware and I was standing up, but my body was
in the bed. There was this darkness around me. Being out of my body was even
more vivid than ordinary experience. It was so vivid that I could see every
room in the house, I could see the top of the house, I could see around the
house, I could see under the house. There was this Light shining. I turned
toward the Light. The Light was very similar to what many other people have
described in their near-death experiences. It was so magnificent. It is
tangible; you can feel it. It is alluring; you want to go to it like you would want
to go to your ideal mother's or father's arms. As I began to move toward the
Light, I knew intuitively that if I went to the Light, I would be dead. So as I
was moving toward the Light I said, "Please wait a minute, just hold on a
second here. I want to think about this; I would like to talk to you before I
go."
To my surprise, the entire experience halted at that point. You are
indeed in control of your near-death experience. You are not on a roller
coaster ride. So my request was honored and I had some conversations with the
Light. The Light kept changing into different figures, like Jesus, Buddha,
Krishna, mandalas, archetypal images and signs. I asked the Light, "What
is going on here? Please, Light, clarify yourself for me. I really want to know
the reality of the situation." I cannot really say the exact words,
because it was sort of telepathy.
The Light responded. The information transferred to me was that your
beliefs shape the kind of feedback you are getting before the Light. If you
were a Buddhist or Catholic or Fundamentalist, you get a feedback loop of your
own stuff. You have a chance to look at it and examine it, but most people do
not. As the Light revealed itself to me, I became aware that what I was really
seeing was our Higher Self matrix.
The only thing I can tell you is that it turned into a matrix, a mandala
of human souls, and what I saw was that what we call our Higher Self in each of
us is a matrix. It's also a conduit to the Source; each one of us comes
directly, as a direct experience from the Source. We all have a Higher Self, or
an oversoul part of our being. It revealed itself to me in its truest energy
form. The only way I can really describe it is that the being of the Higher
Self is more like a conduit. It did not look like that, but it is a direct
connection to the Source that each and every one of us has. We are directly
connected to the Source.
So the Light was showing me the Higher Self matrix. And it became very
clear to me that all the Higher Selves are connected as one being, all humans
are connected as one being, we are actually the same being, different aspects
of the same being. It was not committed to one particular religion. So that is
what was being fed back to me. And I saw this mandala of human souls. It was the
most beautiful thing I have ever seen. I just went into it and, it was just
over-whelming. It was like all the love you've every wanted, and it was the
kind of love that cures, heals, regenerates.
As I asked the Light to keep explaining, I understood what the Higher
Self matrix is. We have a grid around the planet where all the Higher Selves
are connected. This is like a great company, a next subtle level of energy
around us, the spirit level, you might say. Then, after a couple of minutes, I
asked for more clarification. I really wanted to know what the universe is
about, and I was ready to go at that time. I said "I am ready, take
me." Then the Light turned into the most beautiful thing that I have ever
seen: a mandala of human souls on this planet.
Now I came to this with my negative view of what has happen on the
planet. So as I asked the light to keep clarifying for me, I saw in this
magnificent mandala how beautiful we all are in our essence, our core. We are
the most beautiful creations. The human soul, the human matrix that we all make
together is absolutely fantastic, elegant, exotic, everything. I just cannot
say enough about how it changed my opinion of human beings in that instant. I
said, "Oh, God, I did not know how beautiful we are." At any level,
high or low, in whatever shape you are in, you are the most beautiful creation,
you are. I was astonished to find that there was no evil in any soul. I said
"How can this be?" The answer was that no soul was inherently evil.
The terrible things that happened to people might make them do evil things, but
their souls were not evil. What all people seek, what sustains them, is love,
the Light told me. What distorts people is a lack of love.
The revelations coming from the Light seemed to go on and on, then I
asked the Light, "Does this mean that humankind will be saved?" Then,
like a trumpet blast with a shower of spiraling lights, the Great Light spoke,
saying, "Remember this and never forget; you save, redeem and heal
yourself. You always have. You always will. You were created with the power to
do so from before the beginning of the world."
In that instant I realized even more. I realized that WE HAVE ALREADY
BEEN SAVED, and we saved ourselves because we were designed to self-correct
like the rest of God's universe. This is what the second coming is about. I
thanked the Light of God with all my heart. The best thing I could come up with
was these simple words of totally appreciation: "Oh dear God, dear
Universe, dear Great Self, I love my Life."
The Light seemed to breathe me in even more deeply. It was as if the
Light was completely absorbing me. The Love Light is, to this day,
indescribable. I entered into another realm, more profound than the last, and
became aware of something more, much more. It was an enormous stream of Light,
vast and full, deep in the Heart of Life. I asked what this was.
The Light responded, "This is the RIVER OF LIFE. Drink of this
manna water to your heart's content." So I did. I took one big drink and
then another. To drink of Life Itself! I was in ecstasy.
Then the Light said, "You have a desire." The Light knew all
about me, everything past, present and future. Yes!" I whispered.
I asked to see the rest of the Universe; beyond our solar system, beyond
all human illusion. The Light then told me that I could go with the Stream. I
did, and was carried through the Light at the end of the tunnel. I felt and
heard a series of very soft sonic booms. What a rush!
Suddenly, I seemed to be rocketing away from the planet on this stream
of Life. I saw the earth fly away. The solar system, in all its splendor,
whizzed by and disappeared. At faster than light speed, I flew through the
center of the galaxy, absorbing more knowledge as I went. I learned that this
galaxy, and all of the Universe, is bursting with many different varieties of
LIFE. I saw many worlds. The good news is that we are not alone in this
Universe! As I rode this stream of consciousness through the center of the
galaxy, the stream was expanding in awesome fractal waves of energy. The super
clusters of galaxies with all their ancient wisdom flew by. At first I thought
I was going somewhere; actually traveling. But then I realized that, as the
stream was expanding, my own consciousness was also expanding to take in
everything in the Universe! All creation passed by me. It was an unimaginable
wonder! I truly was a Wonder Child; a babe in Wonderland!
It seemed as if all the creations in the Universe soared by me and
vanished in a speck of Light. Almost immediately, a second Light appeared. It
came from all sides, and was so different; a Light made up of more than every
frequency in the Universe. I felt and heard several velvety sonic booms again.
My consciousness, or being, was expanding to interface with the entire
Holographic Universe and more. As I passed into the second Light, the awareness
came to me that I had just transcended the Truth. Those are the best words I
have for it, but I will try to explain. As I passed into the second Light, I expanded
beyond the First Light. I found myself in a profound stillness, beyond all
silence. I could see or perceive FOREVER, beyond Infinity. I was in the Void.
I was in pre-creation, before the Big Bang. I had crossed over the
beginning of time - the First Word - the First vibration. I was in the Eye of
Creation. I felt as if I was touching the Face of God. It was not a religious
feeling. Simply I was at one with Absolute Life and Consciousness.
When I say that I could see or perceive forever, I mean that I could
experience all of creation generating itself. It was without beginning and
without end. That's a mind-expanding thought, isn't it? Scientists perceive the
Big Bang as a single event which created the Universe. I saw that the Big Bang
is only one of an infinite number of Big Bangs creating Universes endlessly and
simultaneously. The only images that even come close in human terms would be
those created by supercomputers using fractal geometry equations.
The ancients knew of this. They said Godhead periodically created new
Universes by breathing out, and de-creating other Universes by breathing in.
These epochs were called Yugas. Modern science called this the Big Bang. I was
in absolute, pure consciousness. I could see or perceive all the Big Bangs or
Yugas creating and de-creating themselves. Instantly I entered into them all
simultaneously. I saw that each and every little piece of creation has the
power to create. It is very difficult to try to explain this. I am still
speechless about this.
It took me years after I returned to assimilate any words at all for the
Void experience. I can tell you this now; the Void is less than nothing, yet
more than everything that is! The Void is absolute zero; chaos forming all
possibilities. It is Absolute Consciousness; much more than even Universal
Intelligence.
Where is the Void? I know. The Void is inside and outside everything.
You, right now even while you live, are always inside and outside the Void
simultaneously. You don't have to go anywhere or die to get there. The Void is
the vacuum or nothingness between all physical manifestations. The SPACE
between atoms and their components.
Modern science has begun to study this space between everything. They
call it Zero-point. Whenever they try to measure it, their instruments go off
the scale, or to infinity, so to speak. They have no way, as of yet, to measure
infinity accurately. There is more of the zero space in your own body and the
Universe than anything else!
What mystics call the Void is not a void. It is so full of energy, a
different kind of energy that has created everything that we are. Everything
since the Big Bang is vibration, from the first Word, which is the first
vibration. The biblical "I am" really has a question mark after it.
"I am - What am I?"
So creation is God exploring God's Self through every way imaginable, in
an ongoing, infinite exploration through every one of us. Through every piece
of hair on your head, through every leaf on every tree, through every atom, God
is exploring God's Self, the great "I am". I began to see that
everything that is, is the Self, literally, your Self, my Self. Everything is
the great Self. That is why God knows even when a leaf falls. That is possible
because wherever you are is the center of the universe. Wherever any atom is,
that is the center of the universe. There is God in that, and God in the Void.
As I was exploring the Void and all the Yugas or creations, I was
completely out of time and space as we know it. In this expanded state, I
discovered that creation is about Absolute Pure Consciousness, or God, coming
into the Experience of Life as we know it. The Void itself is devoid of
experience. It is pre-life, before the first vibration. Godhead is about more
than Life and Death. Therefore there is even more than Life and Death to
experience in the Universe!
I was in the Void and I was aware of everything that had ever been
created. It was like I was looking out of God's eyes. I had become God.
Suddenly I wasn't me anymore. The only thing I can say, I was looking out of
God's eyes. And suddenly I knew why every atom was, and I could see everything.
The interesting point was that I went into the Void, I came back with this
understanding that God is not there. God is here. That's what it is all about.
So this constant search of the human race to go out and find God ...God
gave everything to us, everything is here - this is where it's at. And what we
are into now is God's exploration of God through us. People are so busy trying
to become God that they ought to realize that we are already God and God is
becoming us. That's what it is really about.
When I realized this, I was finished with the Void, and wanted to return
to this creation, or Yuga. It just seemed like the natural thing to do. Then I
suddenly came back through the second Light, or the Big Bang, hearing several
more velvet booms. I rode the stream of consciousness back through all of
creation, and what a ride it was! The super clusters of galaxies came through
me with even more insights.
I passed through the center of our galaxy, which is a black hole. Black
holes are the great processors or recyclers of the Universe. Do you know what
is on the other side of a Black Hole? We are; our galaxy; which has been
reprocessed from another Universe. In its total energy configuration, the
galaxy looked like a fantastic city of lights. All energy this side of the Big
Bang is light. Every sub-atom, atom, star, planet, even consciousness itself is
made of light and has a frequency and/or particle. Light is living stuff.
Everything is made of light, even stones. So everything is alive. Everything is
made from the Light of God; everything is very intelligent.
As I rode the stream on and on, I could eventually see a huge Light
coming. I knew it was the First Light; the Higher Self Light Matrix of our
solar system. Then the entire solar system appeared in the Light, accompanied
by one of those velvet booms. I saw that the solar system we live in is our
larger, local body. This is our local body and we are much bigger than we
imagine. I saw that the solar system is our body. I am a part of this, and the
earth is this great created being that we are, and we are the part of it that
knows that it is. But we are only that part of it. We are not everything, but
we are that part of it that knows that it is.
I could see all the energy that this solar system generates, and it is
an incredible light show! I could hear the Music of the Spheres. Our solar
system, as do all celestial bodies, generates a unique matrix of light, sound
and vibratory energies. Advanced civilizations from other star systems can spot
life as we know it in the universe by the vibratory or energy matrix imprint.
It is child's play. The earth's Wonder Child (human beings) make an abundance
of sound right now, like children playing in the backyard of the universe.
I rode the stream directly into the center of the Light. I felt embraced
by the Light as it took me in with its breath again, followed by another soft
sonic boom.
I was in this great Light of Love with the stream of life flowing
through me. I have to say again, it is the most loving, non-judgmental Light.
It is the ideal parent for this Wonder Child.
"What now?" I wondered.
The Light explained to me that there is no death; we are immortal
beings. We have already been alive forever! I realized that we are part of a
natural living system that recycles itself endlessly. I was never told that I
had to come back. I just knew that I would. It was only natural, from what I had
seen.
I don't know how long I was with the Light, in human time. But there
came a moment when I realized that all my questions had been answered and my
return was near. When I say that all my questions were answered on the other
side, I mean to say just that. All my questions have been answered. Every human
has a different life and set of questions to explore. Some of our questions are
Universal, but each of us is exploring this thing we call Life in our own
unique way. So is every other form of life, from mountains to every leaf on
every tree.
And that is very important to the rest of us in this Universe. Because
it all contributes to the Big Picture, the fullness of Life. We are literally
God exploring God's Self in an infinite Dance of Life. Your uniqueness enhances
all of Life.
As I began my return to the life cycle, it never crossed my mind, nor
was I told, that I would return to the same body. It just did not matter. I had
complete trust in the Light and the Life process. As the stream merged with the
great Light, I asked never to forget the revelations and the feelings of what I
had learned on the other side. There was a "Yes". It felt like a kiss
to my soul.
Then I was taken back through the Light into the vibratory realm again.
The whole process reversed, with even more information being given to me. I
came back home, and I was given lessons on the mechanics of reincarnation. I
was given answers to all those little questions I had: "How does this
work? How does that work?" I knew that I would be reincarnated. The earth
is a great processor of energy, and individual consciousness evolves out of
that into each one of us.
I thought of myself as a human for the first time, and I was happy to be
that. From what I have seen, I would be happy to be an atom in this universe.
An atom. So to be the human part of God ... this is the most fantastic
blessing. It is a blessing beyond our wildest estimation of what blessing can
be. For each and every one of us to be the human part of this experience is
awesome, and magnificent. Each and every one of us, no matter where we are,
screwed up or not, is a blessing to the planet, right where we are.
So I went through the reincarnation process expecting to be a baby
somewhere. But I was given a lesson on how individual identity and
consciousness evolve. So I reincarnated back into this body. I was so surprised
when I opened my eyes. I do not know why, because I understood it, but it was
still such a surprise to be back in this body, back in my room with someone
looking over me crying her eyes out. It was my hospice caretaker. She had given
up an hour and a half after finding me dead. She was sure I was dead; all the
signs of death were there - I was getting stiff.
We do not know how long I was dead, but we do know that it was an hour
and a half since I was found. She honored my wish to have my newly dead body
left alone for a few hours as much as she could. We had an amplified
stethoscope and many ways of checking out the vital functions of the body to see
what was happening. She can verify that I really was dead. It was not a
near-death experience. I experienced death itself for at least an hour and a
half. She found me dead and checked the stethoscope, blood pressure and heart
rate monitor for an hour and a half. Then I awakened and saw the light outside.
I tried to get up to go to it, but I fell out of the bed. She heard a loud
"clunk", ran in and found me on the floor.
When I recovered, I was very surprised and yet very awed about what had
happened to me. At first all the memory of the trip that I have now was not
there. I kept slipping out of this world and kept asking, "Am I
alive?" This world seemed more like a dream than that one. Within three
days, I was feeling normal again, clearer, yet different than I had ever felt
in my life. My memory of the journey came back later. I could see nothing wrong
with any human being I had ever seen. Before that I was really judgmental. I
thought a lot of people were really screwed up, in fact I thought that everybody
was screwed up but me. But I got clear on all that.
About three months later a friend said I should get tested, so I went
and got the scans and so forth. I really felt good, so I was afraid of getting
bad news. I remember the doctor at the clinic looking at the before and after
scans, saying, "Well, there is nothing here now." I said,
"Really, it must be a miracle?" He said "No, these things
happen, they are called spontaneous remission." He acted very unimpressed.
But here was a miracle, and I was impressed, even if no one else was.
The mystery of life has very little to do with intelligence. The
universe is not an intellectual process at all. The intellect is helpful; it is
brilliant, but right now that is all we process with, instead of our hearts and
the wiser part of ourselves.
The center of the earth is this great transmuter of energy, just as you
see in pictures of our earth's magnetic field. That's our cycle, pulling
reincarnated souls back in and through it again. A sign that you are reaching
human level is that you are beginning to evolve an individual consciousness.
The animals have a group soul, and they reincarnate in group souls. A
deer is pretty much going to be a deer forever. But just being born a human,
whether deformed or genius, shows that you are on the path to developing an
individual consciousness. That is in itself part of the group consciousness
called humanity.
I saw that races are personality clusters. Nations like France, Germany
and China each have their own personality. Cities have personalities, their
local group souls that attract certain people. Families have group souls.
Individual identity is evolving like branches of a fractal; the group soul
explores in our individuality. The different questions that each of us has are
very, very important. This is how Godhead is exploring God's Self - through
you. So ask your questions, do your searching. You will find your Self and you
will find God in that Self, because it is only the Self.
More than that, I began to see that each one of us humans are soul
mates. We are part of the same soul fractaling out in many creative directions,
but still the same. Now I look at every human being that I ever see, and I see
a soul mate, my soul mate, the one I have always been looking for. Beyond that,
the greatest soul mate that you will ever have is yourself.
We are each both male and female. We experience this in the womb and we
experience this in reincarnation states. If you are looking for that ultimate
soul mate outside of yourself, you may never find it; it is not there. Just as
God is not "there". God is here. Don't look "out there" for
God. Look here for God. Look through your Self. Start having the greatest love
affair you ever had ... with your Self. You will love everything out of that.
I had a descent into what you might call Hell, and it was very
surprising. I did not see Satan or evil. My descent into Hell was a descent
into each person's customized human misery, ignorance, and darkness of
not-knowing. It seemed like a miserable eternity. But each of the millions of
souls around me had a little star of light always available. But no one seemed
to pay attention to it. They were so consumed with their own grief, trauma and
misery. But, after what seemed an eternity, I started calling out to that
Light, like a child calling to a parent for help.
Then the Light opened up and formed a tunnel that came right to me and
insulated me from all that fear and pain. That is what Hell really is. So what
we are doing is learning to hold hands, to come together. The doors of Hell are
open now. We are going to link up, hold hands, and walk out of Hell together.
The Light came to me and turned into a huge golden angel. I said, "Are you
the angel of death?" It expressed to me that it was my oversoul, my Higher
Self matrix, a super-ancient part of ourselves. Then I was taken to the Light.
"Soon our science will quantify spirit. Isn't that going to be
wonderful? We are coming up with devices now that are sensitive to subtle
energy or spirit energy. Physicists use these atomic colliders to smash atoms
to see what they are made of. They have got it down to quarks and charm, and
all that. Well, one day they are going to come down to the little thing that
holds it all together, and they are going to have to call that ... God. With
atomic colliders they are not only seeing what is in here, but they are
creating particles. Thank God most of them are short-lived milliseconds and
nanoseconds. We are just beginning to understand that we are creating too, as
we go along. As I saw forever, I came to a realm in which there is a point
where we pass all knowledge and begin creating the next fractal, the next
level. We have that power to create as we explore. And that is God expanding
itself through us.
Since my return I have experienced the Light spontaneously, and I have
learned how to get to that space almost any time in my meditation. Each one of
you can do this. You do not have to die to do this. It is within your
equipment; you are wired for it already. The body is the most magnificent Light
being there is. The body is a universe of incredible Light. Spirit is not
pushing us to dissolve this body. That is not what is happening. Stop trying to
become God; God is becoming you. Here.
The mind is like a child running around the universe, demanding this and
thinking it created the world. But I ask the mind: "What did your mother
have to do with this?" That is the next level of spiritual awareness. Oh!
my mother! All of a sudden you give up the ego, because you are not the only
soul in the universe.
One of my questions to the Light was "What is Heaven?" I was
given a tour of all the heavens that have been created: the Nirvanas, the Happy
Hunting Grounds, all of them. I went through them. These are thought form
creations that we have created. We don't really go to heaven; we are
reprocessed. But whatever we created, we leave a part of ourselves there. It is
real, but it is not all of the soul.
"I saw the Christian Heaven. We expect it to be a beautiful place,
and you stand in front of the throne, worshipping forever. I tried it. It is
boring! This is all we are going to do? It is childlike. I do not mean to
offend anyone. Some heavens are very interesting, and some are very boring. I
found the ancient ones to be more interesting, like the Native American ones,
the Happy Hunting Grounds. The Egyptians have fantastic ones. It goes on and
on. There are so many of them. In each of them there is a fractal that is your
particular interpretation, unless you are part of the group soul that believes
in only the God of a particular religion. Then you are very close, in the same
ball park together. But even then, each is a little bit different. That is a
part of yourself that you leave there. Death is about Life, not about Heaven.
"I asked God: "What is the best religion on the planet? Which
one is right?" And Godhead said, with great love: "I don't
care." That was incredible grace. What that meant was that we are the
caring beings here. The Ultimate Godhead of all the stars tells us: "It
does not matter what religion you are." They come and they go, they
change. Buddhism has not been here forever, Catholicism has not been here
forever, and they are all about to become more enlightened. More light is
coming into all systems now. There is going to be a reformation in spirituality
that is going to be just as dramatic as the Protestant Reformation. There will
be lots of people fighting about it, one religion against the next, believing
that only they are right. Everyone thinks they own God, the religions and
philosophies, especially the religions, because they form big organizations
around the philosophy. When Godhead said, "I don't care," I
immediately understood that it is for us to care about. It is important,
because we are the caring beings. It matters to us and that is where it is
important. What you have is the energy equation in spirituality. Ultimate
Godhead does not care if you are Protestant, Buddhist, or whatever. It is all a
blooming facet of the whole. I wish that all religions would realize it and let
each other be. It is not the end of each religion, but we are talking about the
same God. Live and let live. Each has a different view. And it all adds up to
the big picture; it is all important.
"I went over to the other side with a lot of fears about toxic
waste, nuclear missiles, the population explosion, the rainforest. I came back
loving every single problem. I love nuclear waste. I love the mushroom cloud;
this is the holiest mandala that we have manifested to date, as an archetype.
It, more than any religion or philosophy on Earth, brought us together all of a
sudden, to a new level of consciousness. Knowing that maybe we can blow up the
planet fifty times, or 500 times, we finally realize that maybe we are all here
together now. For a period they had to keep setting off more bombs to get it in
to us. Then we started saying, "we do not need this any more." Now we
are actually in a safer world than we have ever been in, and it is going to get
safer. So I came back loving toxic waste, because it brought us together. These
things are so big. As Peter Russell might say, these problems are now
"soul size." Do we have soul size answers? YES!
"The clearing of the rain forest will slow down, and in fifty years
there will be more trees on the planet than in a long time. If you are into
ecology, go for it; you are that part of the system that is becoming aware. Go
for it with all your might, but do not be depressed. It is part of a larger
thing. Earth is in the process of domesticating itself. It is never again going
to be as wild a place as it once was. There will be great wild places, reserves
where nature thrives. Gardening and reserves will be the thing in the future.
Population increase is getting very close to the optimal range of energy to
cause a shift in consciousness. That shift in consciousness will change
politics, money, energy.
"What happens when we dream? We are multi-dimensional beings. We
can access that through lucid dreaming. In fact, this universe is God's dream.
One of the things that I saw is that we humans are a speck on a planet that is
a speck in a galaxy that is a speck. Those are giant systems out there, and we
are in sort of an average system. But human beings are already legendary
throughout the cosmos of consciousness. The little bitty human being of
Earth/Gaia is legendary. One of the things that we are legendary for is
dreaming. We are legendary dreamers. In fact, the whole cosmos has been looking
for the meaning of life, the meaning of it all. And it was the little dreamer
who came up with the best answer ever. We dreamed it up. So dreams are
important.
"After dying and coming back, I really respect life and death. In
our DNA experiments we may have opened the door to a great secret. Soon we will
be able to live as long as we want to live in this body. After living 150 years
or so, there will be an intuitive soul sense that you will want to change
channels. Living forever in one body is not as creative as reincarnation, as
transferring energy in this fantastic vortex of energy that we are in. We are
actually going to see the wisdom of life and death, and enjoy it. As it is now,
we have already been alive forever. This body that you are in, has been alive
forever. It comes from an unending stream of life, going back to the Big Bang
and beyond. This body gives life to the next life, in dense and subtle energy.
This body has been alive forever already."
"We are going to link up, hold hands, and walk out of hell
together." - Mellen Benedict